Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Komodo Dragon Dog

We recently went to the Memphis Zoo. 
We saw a sign saying "Dragons This Way". 
Boy, was Gigi disappointed when she got there. 
Instead of seeing a winged, iridescent scaled, fire breathing sepeant of the sky...she saw a big lizard. 
A Komodo Dragon. 
No fire. 
No wings. 
Nothing but three large gray lizards sitting motionless on three large rocks. 
But we did learn that Komodo Dragons have poisonous saliva so their bite is very dangerous. 
And they run really fast. 
Little did we know we would soon see a fire breathing dragon. 
At home. 

My dad always buys fireworks to shoot off at our house on the 4th of July. 
Nothing too big. 
Just enough to get some oohs and aahs out of the kids. 
And to scare the poop out of our dog Wilie. 
Willie spends the 4th in his dog crate with the radio on loudly in the room with the windows closed. 
Otherwise he runs away. 
And then there's Lola. 
She doesn't run away. 
She runs towards. 
Towards the fireworks. 
Towards the sparks that emit from the fuse before the fun begins. 
I don't know why she's so obsessed. 
Is she trying to kill it?
Does she get excited because we're excited?
I think it's for other reasons. 
I think she secretly wants to be a dragon. 
And this year, she did it. 

These are snakes. 

You light the tablet and within seconds it turns into a snakelike creature. 
Getting longer and creepier by the second. 
I have no idea what's in it to do this. 
It's just fun. 
So we burn them. 
And Lola couldn't stay away from them. 
So, as soon as one was lit, she attacked. 
The black tablet was on fire. 
No snake had emerged yet. 
It was a ball of fire. 
And Lola ate it. 
She became the fire breathing dragon Gigi has hoped to see!
Lola Dragon!
Nothing will kill this beast. 
She's eaten many odd things over the years.
She has a hole in her heart that should have killed her years ago. 
Our vet is astonished to see her every year. 
Yet she's still here. 
Eating fire. 
Our real life Komodo Dragon Dog. 
Coming soon to a zoo near you. 

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