Learning To Let Go

I've been protective of my kiddos for the past few years.
Since one has cancer, I do get a free pass with that, right?
Protective in terms of germs and always knowing where they are and what they are doing.
I'm trying to get all free-rangey with them, though.
I don't drop them off at the mall or have them do my grocery shopping while I sit at the DQ.
Yet.
But, I do let them play outside at home unsupervised, walk way ahead of me on downtown sidewalks, go to the bathroom alone at restaurants (Zoe only on that one, Gigi can't reach sinks or door locks on stalls yet).

I ALWAYS worry, though.
It's the mama in me.
Zoe has been invited to a sleepover party at a local hotel where there's a fancy indoor pool.
We are letting her go.
Sigh.
Worry.
Anxiety.
Yuck.
What if she runs in the pool area and slips?
What if another girl makes a comment about her port?
What if she misses me?
Maybe I should go.

I could get my own room.
Near the pool, of course.
I'll be hiding out in my room with my Cheese Nips, Diet Coke and binoculars.
It will be a scene straight out of a Wes Anderson movie.
The curtains will be closed and all that will be visible will be the round ends of my spy scopes.
Then, I'll have to finally give in and pee from all of the Diet Coke consumption and when I return to the window...empty pool.
What the?!
So, I'll have to scurry through the halls like a mouse.
A very big mouse.
And Zoe and her gang will be moving down the hall on the way to the vending machines and I'll have to hide!
Where?!
I know, I'll hide behind the ice machine until they go by.
"Mom, what are you doing?!"
"Oh, Hi Zoe! You're at this hotel? I thought you were staying at a different hotel. I'm here for a meeting."
"Mom! You dropped me off here!!"
I'm making my reservation now.

School field trips are scheduled for April and May for both girls.
They will need to ride a bus to get to the destinations.
The trips will be out of town.
On a bus?
What the?!
What if the ride is too bouncy?
What if the tummy gets all sicky?
What if Gigi has to pee?
I'll have to hide under the bus, all strapped up to the under carriage like Robert Mitchum-Robert De Niro in Cape Fear.
Any mom would, right?
Right?